Toby’s pregnancy
New addition
(We were shocked to find out we were pregnant.)
(We were shocked to find out we were pregnant.)
it’s a boy!
(I was not surprised to find out I was having a boy, but felt a little crushed that I would never have a girl. Oh little did I know...)
(I was not surprised to find out I was having a boy, but felt a little crushed that I would never have a girl. Oh little did I know...)
Dear Healthcare Provider
(I have never been so angry and embarrassed. Looking back, I should have sued.)
(I have never been so angry and embarrassed. Looking back, I should have sued.)
The birth
(We almost died. I really thought we were going to.)
(We almost died. I really thought we were going to.)
Toby’s Death
Passing
(Writing that entry on the day he died felt surreal.)
(Writing that entry on the day he died felt surreal.)
(Measuring things in terms of your child's death and trying to go on were things that I had never thought of until now.)
Karen’s entry
(I feel conflicted about this now. I don't agree with some of the things that are written and it feels strange to have someone else write about your mental status. But at the time I was glad she wrote it.)
(I feel conflicted about this now. I don't agree with some of the things that are written and it feels strange to have someone else write about your mental status. But at the time I was glad she wrote it.)
(Some of my friends got together and raised money for us. It was thoughtful.)
(This is from Pete's sister, a voice of reason in his family.)
(After a month and a half, people were complaining that all of my entries were too depressing. I then created my SIDS blog.)
Salt in my tears
(I was really trying to move on past the nastiness that was being thrown our way. It was hard.)
(I was really trying to move on past the nastiness that was being thrown our way. It was hard.)
(This was a beautiful letter I received. I don't even remember who it was from now.)
Maybe
(I had never experienced anything as nasty as the public comment I got from my in-law less than three weeks after my son died.)
(I had never experienced anything as nasty as the public comment I got from my in-law less than three weeks after my son died.)
Well, hell
(Mom wrote an excellent email/comment about Toby's death to the people who were giving us grief.)
(Mom wrote an excellent email/comment about Toby's death to the people who were giving us grief.)
Tribute to Allison
(Pete's mother passed away about 3 weeks after Toby died. It was a rough time.)
Two nights in a local B&B
(Pete's mother passed away about 3 weeks after Toby died. It was a rough time.)
Two nights in a local B&B
(A man who owned a local B&B found my blog and invited me to come and stay for two nights for free to get away.)
(One of Pete's "friends" started drama under this post. I will still never understand any of that.)
(I deleted a comment from a girl named ELizabeth who helpfully wrote me and told me that it was probably just a seizure and that I needed to go get me some Klonopin. Gee, thanks.)
Pete’s mom’s service
(I couldn't believe the road we seemed to be going down. Could things get worse?)
(I couldn't believe the road we seemed to be going down. Could things get worse?)
(After all the stress from people and the way they acted about Toby's death, my mom finally had a stroke two months after he died.)
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