Saturday, July 7, 2012


We finally got to visit the grave and decorate it. The kids made Toby a birthday cake, too. It was really good. Iris liked licking the spoon so at least she fits in well with the rest of us. (In one picture you can see our homemade kitchen island. We made it from two old kitchen cabinets, an old door, and some paint-all from the Habitat for Humanity Restore.)

I think his grave turned out well.

Good to be back home.

Toby's birthday cake

very colorful 

one view from his grave

shells we brought back from the beach for him last year. The cars are from Sam. 

Sam likes playing under this tree. 

That is the knife that Pete designed in Toby's name. 

Pete is getting great at knife making! I think he has found his calling. 

We clearly don't believe in the words "too much."


Susan said...

I "liked" it on facebook - then I worried if that was appropriate... y'know - "liking" a child's grave. Obviously I don't like it. I would rather he was 2 years old and 2 days... and playing with Thomas the Tank...

But given that isn't an option, I often find myself standing back pleased with my efforts on Catherine's grave.. and I sort of imagine you must feel the same - because it looks pretty good.

Happy Birthday Toby - it is not as it should be, but you are always loved and remembered xx

I hope you are feeling better too xx

Rebecca said...

We are at the point now where we can find some humor about things. Like last year, when we stuck sparklers in the ground by his grave, and they caught the grass on fire. Or the fact that his grave is soooo busy and colorful that it verges on tacky. Or that his grave is kind of on a big slope so we worry that when we are burried beside him we will roll off down the hill into the road. We joke about these things.

And yeah, we are pretty pleased with the way it looks. I think a baby's space should be bright and cheerful and colorful. Of course, I wish it could be a bedroom. Or a playroom. Or anything but a gravesite.

Maxie's Mommy said...

It looks like a celebration of his life. I don't think they'd let us do that at Max's grave. Even the pinwheels are taboo. I am glad to hear you are home. I hope that means you are doing better.

Jayden's Mommy said...

Rebecca firts i hope you are feeling better. Second i have not had the courage to visit the graveside. I hope soon maybe tomorrow. I find myself in disbelief still. It gives me strenght and comfort to hear peace in your words and acceptance. I will rather Toby was here. Thinking of your precious boy.